What is Happiness and how to Achieve it?

How to be Happy

Preferred to watch the video instead? https://youtu.be/uNgOEfo7WDs?si=HVlyocxJaHDeFCM-

Have you ever had the feeling of being empty inside? I do. I have a successful business. I am active everyday by going on super long walks with my dog, working out relentlessly at the gym, and playing some sports regularly such as golf or pickleball, so I don’t have any time during the day to feel lonely. So, I thought I have a happy life. However, one day my sister asked if I am truly happy. I took a moment to think and answered: no, I don’t think that I am happy. “Why?”, my sister asked? I said the ultimate reason is because I don’t have a significant other in my life to share precious moments with. However, I am not quite sure that one has to have a significant other to be happy?

Today, I went to ChatGPT and asked, “what is happiness?”, and here is the long answer I got.

Happiness is a deeply personal and multifaceted concept that varies from person to person. At its core, happiness is a state of well-being and contentment that encompasses positive emotions, a sense of fulfillment, and a meaningful life. There are 4 dimensions of happiness: emotional happiness, psychological happiness, social happiness and philosophical perspectives.

1. Emotional Happiness

• What it feels like: Joy, excitement, peace, or satisfaction in the moment.

• How to create emotional feeling: Spending time with loved ones, engaging in hobbies, or achieving a goal.

2. Psychological Happiness

• What it means: A deeper sense of purpose, meaning, and alignment with one’s values.

• Sources: Self-acceptance, personal growth, and relationships that feel authentic and fulfilling.

3. Social Happiness

• What it involves: Connection, belonging, and mutual support.

• Sources: Strong friendships, family bonds, or being part of a community.

4. Philosophical Perspectives

• Eudaimonia is a Greek word coined by Aristotle literally translating to the state or condition of good spirit, which is commonly translated as happiness. He believes that true happiness comes from living a virtuous and meaningful life, not just fleeting pleasures.  This involves cultivating moral virtues (like courage, temperance, and justice) and intellectual virtues (like wisdom and understanding).

How to Achieve Eudaimonia

• Cultivate Virtues: Practice traits like honesty, courage, kindness, and humility.

• Live with Purpose: Reflect on your goals and align them with a deeper sense of meaning.

• Seek Excellence: Strive to improve in all areas of life, whether personal, professional, or social.

• Engage in Meaningful Activities: Focus on contributions to others and society.

• Practice Reflection: Regularly assess whether your actions align with your values and long-term fulfillment.

• Hedonism: Happiness is about maximizing pleasure and minimizing pain.

What Influences Happiness?

1. Genetics: About 40–50% of your happiness is influenced by your temperament.

2. Circumstances: External factors like health, income, and relationships contribute roughly 10%.

3. Intentional Actions: Choices, habits, and mindset account for up to 40% of happiness.

How to Cultivate Happiness

1. Practice Gratitude: Regularly acknowledge the positive aspects of your life.

2. Build Strong Relationships: Invest time and energy in meaningful connections.

3. Engage in Activities That Bring Flow: Do things that fully immerse you, like hobbies or creative pursuits.

4. Focus on Physical Health: Exercise, sleep, and nutrition play a big role.

5. Help Others: Altruism and acts of kindness can boost long-term happiness.

Happiness is not a constant state; it ebbs and flows. The key is often in appreciating the journey rather than constantly seeking an end destination.

Because the feeling of happiness goes up and down, and being influenced, to some degrees, by external circumstances, Martha Stewart once said “If you want to be happy for a year, get married. If you want to be happy for a decade, get a dog. If you want to be happy for the rest of your life, get a garden.” She said that probably in a humous way, but I am sure it has a lot of truth in it too. Gardening can be so soothing for the soul and it could last a lifetime.

However, I also saw a similar saying that “if you want to be happy for the rest of your life, help others.”, and I agreed with it much more. I definitely feel happy, proud and fulfilled after I help someone or doing charity work. Helping people is not the only thing that brings you happiness as mentioned earlier. It comes from genetics, circumstances and intentional actions, but I wanted to dig deeper into the reasons why helping people makes ones happy, and here are the answers.

Helping others makes you happy because it taps into deeply ingrained psychological, biological, and social mechanisms that foster well-being. Here’s why:

1. Biological Reasons

• Release of "Feel-Good" Chemicals:
  Acts of kindness stimulate the brain to release chemicals like dopamine (pleasure), serotonin (mood regulation), and oxytocin (bonding). This is often referred to as the "helper's high."

• Stress Reduction:
  Helping others has been shown to lower cortisol levels, which reduces stress and promotes relaxation.

2. Psychological Reasons

• Sense of Purpose:
  Helping others gives you a feeling of being useful and connected to something bigger than yourself, which contributes to a sense of fulfillment.

• Positive Self-Image:
  Acts of kindness boost your self-esteem and reinforce your identity as a caring, capable, and valuable person.

• Distraction from Personal Problems:
  Helping others shifts your focus away from your own challenges, reducing feelings of worry or anxiety.

3. Social Reasons

• Strengthened Relationships:
  Helping others builds trust, strengthens bonds, and fosters a sense of community. These connections are essential for long-term happiness.

• Reciprocity:
  Altruism often leads to others being kind in return, creating a cycle of positivity and mutual support.

4. Evolutionary Reasons

• Survival Advantage:
  Humans are wired for cooperation because helping each other increases the chances of survival for the group. Acts of kindness trigger feelings of happiness, reinforcing this behavior over generations.

5. Scientific Evidence

• Studies consistently show that people who volunteer or help others report higher levels of happiness, life satisfaction, and even physical health. For example:

  • Helping someone boosts your emotional well-being as much as receiving help.

  • People who regularly volunteer have lower rates of depression and live longer on average.

Philosophical Perspective

• Helping others aligns with universal moral and ethical principles across cultures and religions, fostering inner peace and contentment.

By helping others, you strengthen your own sense of belonging, purpose, and joy. Have you experienced happiness from helping someone recently? If yes, please share your experience with us in the comments section. Thank you for watching my episode about Happiness.